illaminati:

"maybe you shouldnt eat all of tha-"

image

Friendly reminder that anyone born between 1985-1998 didn’t get their hogwarts letter because Voldemort’s ministry wiped out the record of muggleborns

snickidoodle:

d0nn0:

beyoncevevo:

there needs to be a month between august and september 

october???

son i have news for you

"Fuck, my tea."
me approximately an hour after every time I make tea (via madopiano)

fadeintocase:

rambling-insanity:

fadeintocase:

I don’t understand how people can shower in like five minutes I mean I can go as fast as I can I still have to shampoo my hair and condition my hair and scrub myself and shave and cut myself shaving and use the blood in my summoning of the dark lord then travel to another dimension to ward off my enemies then come back and dry off how do you do that in five minutes

2 in 1 shampoo/conditioner

FUCK

OF COURSE

punkasslouis:

do you ever see an opinion that’s so terrible that you actually feel bad for that person’s brain

  • *breastfeeding in public*
  • *random woman looking at me in disgust*
  • Me: oh I'm sorry am I disturbing you by feeding my child?
  • Woman: I just don't see the need for you to expose your breast like that while some of us are trying to eat
  • Me: hmm I have a blanket if you like?
  • Woman: yes that would help
  • Me: here *passes blanket* cover your head with it you ignorant fool. My child is also trying to eat.
  • breatheghost:

unimpressedcats:

when your leg turns against you

I CAN’T STOP LAUGHING. OMFG.
    "I know"
    Me even when I don’t know   (via daughterofgollum)